12. Anyone Could, Everyone should - homeschooling

Setting aside the financial

debate, everyone should be

home-schooling.

I understand that is a firm stance to take and I stand by it. For centuries people have done it. Most of our founding fathers were home-educated.

Noting the financial aspect: there are grant programs to provide assistance. I personally receive grants worth $1,800 per school-age child for supplies and materials. A quick internet search on "online charter school" for your state should yield results.

The public school system was created in the 19th century and has developed into a failed daycare system. In 1980 the federal government took over when they established the Department of Education. Since then, that ship was sunk.

Don't get me wrong, teachers are not the problem. I have friends who are teachers and they are some of the most compassionate and hardworking humans I know. The way the government has put kids on a factory conveyor belt is the problem. When things become streamlined, creativity is lost. If you don't fit their mold they will trim the fat until all that was beautifully unique is lost.

I always loved the idea of homeschooling before I had kids. I thought it would be simple and manageable. When my oldest became school age I realized I could not do it. I was better off leaving it to the professionals, I thought.

Our second daughter was three and I was nine months pregnant when I enrolled our eldest in school. I was so deep in the trenches I was lucky enough to be surviving each day. The school was unconventional but the space to breath was such a relief for our family. Because i intended to home school from the start, I gave little consideration to the schools available to us. I googles schools in my area and picked the closest one to our house. We happened to live near a Montessori charter school. I had never heard of a charter school, or a Montessori school.

Boy, did we hit the jackpot!

Now, just because I advocate for home-schooling does not mean you should be ashamed of yourself for choosing any other options. It has to be the right time for you and your family. If you do decide to put your kids in school you're allowed to change your mind and if now just isn't the right time, you can hold on to the idea and mull it around in the back of your mind for a while until it is. There are a lot of factors to consider.

But remember this:

You are the gatekeeper of your family's welfare.

After a year and a half in the most perfect school, we moved across the country where no charter schools were available. we were forced into a "neighborhood school" system. For those of you who don't know, a charter school is a private institution that is not regulated by the local school board. They are free to attend because the facility applies for educational grants to cover tuition and supply costs. Most charter schools are highly sought after and some have a lottery system for admissions.

After seeing what sending her to school could offer us as a family I assumed that the local public school would be a good fit too.

I could not have been more wrong. The patient, kind, organized child that the Montessori program had delivered to us was undone in a blink. After only one semester (3 months) I withdrew her.

At the public school they spent a good deal of their day on a tablet, and were not given physical materials outside of coloring books to pass the time. My daughter came home every day overstimulated and just mean to the bone.

There is a name for this behavior: "After-school Restraint Collapse".

It happens so often that it became a diagnosis, but just because it's common doesn't mean it's normal. Kids shouldn't be put into an environment where they have to restrain themselves in the name of education. Especially when the basis of education is to learn, explore, and to be curious.

Our girl who had no previous behavioral problems was screaming in fits of unbelievable rage at any minor inconvenience. This was not ok with me.

And don't get me started on waiting for the bus in the snow at 7:00 am.

We are not morning people on a good day.

After baby number four, I finally felt like I was starting to grasp motherhood. With the way school was going it was clearly time for another change. I don't want my kids to grow up in the fast paced world of instant gratification that provides tablets for bored students. I want my kids to experience boredom. Boredom is the gateway to creativity!

It was time to try homeschooling again! But this time I was going for two kids at once with a kindergartner and 1st grader. What was I thinking?!

I started by googling the laws. I found out that the laws regarding homeschooling in my state are pretty much none; and that's how I like it. You just file a letter with the state saying

"We're doing the dang thing,"

and they say

"Cool. Have fun,"

(with an official stamp of approval)

Now, all that said I still want to make sure my kids are appropriately prepared for life, so I also looked up the standard learning schedule based on age or grade. I use this material very, very loosely.

You see, the secret to home schooling is not to keep up with the other kids. It's to keep up with their natural imagination. Kids don't need reward systems and punishment to make them learn. Learning IS the reward. They naturally want to know everything.

If they are told - Do this, or else you'll fail - it takes the joy out of learning. They become fixated on failure. True learning can not happen within the presence of fear.

I remember hating school; everything about it. I told people I was "Just doing my time" as if it was prison. (Which, by the way, why do most schools legitimately look and operate like prisons? Food for thought.)

Now we Unschool.

Our school day is completely tailored to what works for us. Our sleep schedules are not interfered with (crucial for mental focus). Our meals are eaten when we're hungry and with approved ingredients. We study anything and everything that strikes our fancy. We have created an early demand for a healthy work-life balance within our kids. They were not designed to be drones in a cubical. They have ambitions beyond your imagination. and most important, when we need a mental health day we don't have to check first if the bureaucratic system will allow it.

Our family comes first.

Learning only can happen when your mind is available to thrive and focus. All kids have a natural curiosity. They begin to ask why at a wee three years of age and only stop when the safety of their creativity is threatened.

Of course you love your family, but if you want the opportunity to build a deep relationship with them too, you will have to get to know them genuinely. Don't let the government system steal this opportunity from you.

You won't get this time back.

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